Just chillin at the gym 😏💪
1

guy:

u can’t spell boobytrap without partyboob

accendas:

i literally dont talk to anyone unless they talk to me first

monobeartheater:

verylittlebird:

a magician asks you to pick a card - any card, in fact. you do. they ask you to put the card back in the pack - anywhere in the pack, in fact. you do. they walk away. ten years later, your wife gives birth to the six of clubs. “is this your card?” the midwife asks, in a familiar voice.

what the fuck

backpat:

she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts

she’s tagged/perfect, i’m just tagged/cutie

kushandwizdom:

Teen quotes

psych-facts:

1. There are plenty of ways to enter a pool. The stairs is not one of them.

2. Never cancel dinner plans by text message.

3. Don’t knock it ‘til you try it.

4. If a street performer makes you stop walking, you owe him a buck.

5. Always use ‘we’ when referring to your home…

chasingtrophywhitetails:

Does anyone else reply to a text mentally but not physically then forgets to actually reply all together or is that just me

  • Me: *during sex* ....i think i hear someone coming....
  • girl: ....who?
  • me: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE *bust nut*
  • caseyanthonyofficial:

    I just invented a new word:

    Plagiarism